The Man in the Mirror - which one is the real me?




Over the last several weeks I have been attending vocational classes in Information Technology. I get up in the morning and as I am getting ready to go to class, I look in the bathroom and mirror to do my hair and makeup. I then go into my bedroom, and get dressed. I hate getting dressed. I don't like how much I weigh, how my clothes fit, or the options I have had as the spring is turning to summer. Summer meaning that I can't cover my curves and bulges with sweaters and loose clothing. Summer is a miserable time. 

Once I get to the building there are two sets of double doors leading into the building. It's the worst part of my day. The reflection in those double doors makes me look fatter than any other reflection I see. But I march on, because that what people do. I am on my way to class. By the time I get off the elevator on the 8th floor my mind has generally turned to something else. 

After class I drive home. Where I am currently renting there is a glass storm-door that I have to open before I can enter the apartment. Again, I see my reflection. I am generally more disheveled than the fresh look I had when I left the house. However, the reflection in the glass is more thinning, even than the mirror in my bedroom, so the disheveled girl creates a little hope for the fat girl. 

Danger lurks in the spaces where we compare ourselves to others. 

Classes are over, and I have a little more time to breathe and think on life. I was having a discussion with my soon-to-be 24 year-old daughter who struggles with social anxiety. As the conversation turned to questions of social acceptance, beauty standards, clothing choices, and how we handle the pressure to fit in, I thought of all those reflections I see every day, and I began to ask myself - which one is the most accurate reflection? Does it matter, because I know which one that sticks with me day in and day out. Yep, it's the fat one. When I consider what I am going to wear or how I am going to look in any given outfit, it's always the fat reflection that I am trying to please. Imagine standing in front of a funhouse mirror - you know those ones that distort your reflection - and trying to figure out which one you are going to believe. Whether it is our weight, our nose size, our hair, our eyebrows, even in today's world, our very gender, it is as though we are looking at our reflection through a funhouse mirror, trying to figure out which of those reflections I should trust. 

We give that reflection power when we look at ourselves through others' eyes.

Rare is the person who has overcome the temptation to compare themselves to those around them. Social media has made the problem exponentially worse, because on social media we compare the highlight reels of other people's lives to our everyday existence. I desire to see myself accurately. The problem is, like the funhouse mirror, each individual reflects back at me a different and incomplete perspective of who I am. Which of those reflections do I give power to? How do I know if any of them reflect the real me?

Which reflection is the real me?

When others look at us, who do they see? When I look in the mirror, who do I see? The Bible says, 

"The son [Jesus] is the radiance of God's glory, the exact representation of his being." Hebrews 1:2a

And in another place

"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." Ephesians 5:1

The person we should be emulating is Jesus. If I am a new creation in Christ, and I am working every day to "Take off the Old Self and to put on the New Self", then I should find that, when I look into the mirror his reflection is the one staring back at me. 







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